Me, from Fitchburg, Massachusetts, waiting to see Randy Jackson, Paula Abdul, and Simon Cowell. On my left is Jason Edwards. The girl is Laressa Knight.
  • Becky O'Donahue from New York. Made it to the TOP 24 for American Idol 5!!!....and was also one of the first to leave:-(
  • This is Curt from Danvers, Ma. and Anthony from Peabody. This pic was taken off of Curt's myspace profile. I joined him for lunch.
  • Ayla Brown from Wrentham, MA. Made it to the TOP 16 for American Idol 5!!!
  • Friday, October 28, 2016

    The "Underground" Movement.

    Filming a paparazzi-like documentary takes a complete turn of events when then 26 year old Miranda Tozier-Robbins is arrested on the property of celebrity Britney Spears. Telling her story from idea to execution you will be included on the documentary trail and what it’s like to literally be an overnight sensation

    "...a literary maze of artistic and grammatical intellect...award worthy..." MTR

    Available now on Kindle and Amazon:-)

    “Once you were caught at Brit's house and had auditioned [for the singing competition American
    Idol], with a song of hers, people were seeing it as a possibility of a {person who previously auditioned for the same show, Paula [GoodSpeed,]} Since Paula [committed suicide], no one could get in her head and figure out why she had done that. The assumption is that's what they

    want [from you], that connection to explain it.”

    Table of Contents

    Prologue                                                             i
    Chapter 1: The City of Angels                                   1
    Chapter 2: School and Work                                      17
    Chapter 3: The Idea, the Plan, the Challenge                    19
    Chapter 4: Final Preparations, Provisions, and Planning         41
    Chapter 5: The Mission                                          44
    Chapter 6: My Fifteen Minutes of Fame                           82
    Chapter 7: Legalities                                          119                                                                             

    Friday, December 19, 2014

    Sign my Petition

    we petition the obama administration to:

    ask Sony to release The Interview, publicize and premiere it just as grand as continuing the marathon or the towers.

    We the People believe that the free exchange of art and ideas, should not and will not be intimidated by foreign or domestic terror threats. Should there be any merit to anything happening at a theatre with the movie The Interview, we walk in fully knowing the dangers of what could happen, the show still going on with or without patrons.

    Wednesday, June 27, 2007

    new blog up

    Idol Fever: Part Deux

    Thursday, April 26, 2007

    Idol Fever: Part Deux

    Coming soon...

    With the ending of Season 6 nearing I'm a little antsy to know if auditions for American Idol Season 7 will be anywhere I'm able to get to....
    I had a third go at the auditions in New Jersey for season 6 but I couldn't even pass round 1. I blame it all on my farmer overalls....however, I'm anticipating a "need" for another first-hand Idol experiance blog...
    Idol Fever: Part Deux coming soon.....

    Wednesday, January 31, 2007


    Well, it's been about a year since this whole 'Idol thing and now the wagon has moved on to Season 6. Why am I writing? Well, for those who have followed the blog from the beginning may notice some posts are deleted. The ones about Ayla Brown. At the time they were written, it was out of jealousy and the fact there was a huge class difference. It gave me inspiration behind the mean comments. I completely stereotyped her and tried so hard to dis-credit her claiming she did nothing and her parents did everything. I was wrong.
    "Downtown" Ayla Brown is a hardworking individual. You don't become one of the best all-time basketball players in the state by smiling at the cameras and shopping at the mall. I do have to keep in mind that this girl is fresh from high school, someplace I haven't been in nearly 10 years, though I feel like that's where I live considering I live with a bunch of Art Institute freshman and they think they're still in high school too. That's a different story.
    Ayla Brown has a CD out now...As of the time this was posted, I've only heard one track so far. "Forward". It's a ballad..a belnd of soul/pop. I was listening to it while playing poker so I wasn't really listening to the words but I did hear the melody and her voice. For those anxiuos to hear the review, here it is:

    The Review

    FORWARD: The title of this track makes me wonder; it could be a double pun on the fact she's a basketball forward and, the excuse anyone can use, she's moving forward in her life. With a powerful title the song takes a yet slower pace.
    It's a ballad introduced by a piano. Somewhere after the piano's entrance Ayla comes in low telling her story of a well remembered romance. Being taken across bridges and choruses runs you smack into what appears to sound like a gospel choir. After Ayla finishes her climax she reminds us over of the point of the title where the piano takes us home.

    4 and 1/4 Stars.

    Falling Into You
    There is an R&B tone here with the voice over tracks. Add to it exotic elements which go well with the Mexican themed cover. For a lesson in eroticism in song, Falling Into You is the perfect 101. Beginning with fantasiful moans through a journey of yearning comments, one would be tempted to stop the track and scold the guy for making Ayla to continue begging for his vow. There is a catchy melody here which makes this track my personal fave.

    4 1/2 Stars

    Wednesday, March 15, 2006

    Now It's Time to Say Goodbye:-)

    Yes, this is the end. This blog accomplished what it was intended to do. Tell a story. As of now there are 12 people left in the competition. Doesn't matter. The rest will be history. Viewers can follow that story as it unfolds on television. I'm going back to my world and will emerge again when the time comes. And now I say goodbye. Mj, DJ Slim, Laura, Big shoutout to you guys as you guys were practically there from the beginning. Good journalistic values and efforts. Keep up the good work. Goodbye once agan. Have a magical day:-)

    Tuesday, February 21, 2006

    Here's one source to view me in the background....

    I'm sure you guys remember Mr. I'm nervouse and I gotta pee..." His name is Michael Sandecki and he has a video clip of his portion of the AI show on his MySpace profile. There's a part when Ryan was talking. I was sitting in the chairs against the wall behind him....

    Monday, February 20, 2006

    I added the pics...

    ...Okay the pics were sent to me by someone nice enough to go through the effort of getting them for me(KellanC )....When I viewed them, they filled up the whole screen. I saved to the computer. In order to IMG SRC a pic I need a web address. I used my yahoogroup to post the photos on and then use the www adress from there to fill in the image HTML code.....sound right? Well, the two timy squares of me at the top and the tiny box of Ayla and her family from her Dad's official site is all that's left of the transaction. Reminds me of Wonka vision...

    I do have a guestbook way at the bottom of the page. I have over 5,000 hits yet 4 postings in my guestbook (one of which is mine). And the others, thanks guys, MJ and peeps....
    Again that's located way at the bottom of the page...

    Thursday, February 09, 2006

    My pic is on the Official American Idol website:-)

    Yes. Under the Boston pics, I'm number 193 and 194. Anyone know how to copy and paste these copywritten pictures? I can't seem to do it...

    If any one would like to help cut the pics and e-mail them to me, that'd be great....

    Tuesday, February 07, 2006

    I was in the background...

    Everything from my blog came true.....Ayla Brown...of course Mommy and daddy wanted their tv time. Gail Huff was sooooooo fucking fake it was sickening....The O'Donahue twins. Becky was just so beautiful. I can't wait for her to hit the high notes in Hollywood. Our boy that had to run to the bathroom. Now I know the full context of it. He sat on my lap earlier in the day....The GWAR boys! WE hung out at lunch and had a puff session. And of course, my white boy rapper..Ghost. He was cute and adorible. He was totally free styling. I give him props for trying. He does have his own CD and I'm sure it's hot.
    If you knew where to look I was in the background. Also win Ryan was talking I was sitting outside the judges room...I wish I was on tv. Guess this is the end of Idol Fever Approaching. I'll still check this place daily. Maybe add a post here and there.
    I'm in Disney World. The place where Magic is real and dreams come true. Someday, I'll have my day....until then I have to keep dreaming...
    Cuz I've been dreaming of you tonight, till tommorrow, I'll be holding you tight. And there's no where in the world, I'd rather be. Then here in your arms, thinking about you and me.....Looks like I have my AI 6 song all planned out....


    It's finally here. Last. I had a feeling it'd be last. I also have another feeling my face won't be seen on tv at all. I didn't act stupid. I didn't go off on the mouth. No crazy costume. When Simon first said, "That was horrible," and the other judges agreed, I should have said "Thank-you" and walked out. They sat there waiting for me to talk or do something so they could make look stupid. I was making my 7 hour day, weeks of preparation, lost pay time and sleeping in the rain worth my visit to the celebrity judges. I got my "monies" worth...Just call me the underdog...

    Wednesday, January 25, 2006

    Still no Boston auditions...I predict it last

    Chicago, Denver, Greensboro, San week it's Vegas...I predict Austin will be after that followed by Boston. At Gillette Stadium the producers were announcing "Boston will be the premiere." They kept trying to get the crowd hyped up. "Boston, you guys are opening the show." "Boston, the premiere is starting with you guys." What happened?
    I think I know....they are holding Boston for last since internet users know most of the story of what went down at the Convention Center. Everyone knows the judges weren't at the stadium. Everyone knows all those thousands of people at the stadium weren't seen by the judges. Everyone knows there were cuts before the judges. Everyone knows about Ayla Brown. Everyone knows about Becky O'Donahue. Everyone knows about Colton Rudloff. Everyone knows about the girl from Fitchburg who has an access television show, graduated from college, went to the military, worked at Disney, auditioned for AI, failed, went back to school, and auditioned again in Boston. She failed and did what Paula Abdul said to do the first she met her.."Go back to Disney." (check out for full story) WEll, I'm here. Now what Paula?
    American Idol knows the existence of this blog. Is that why they are saving Boston till last? To keep us all interested to see how well the show lines up with my blog? I bet they won't even show my clip because I didn't wear a crazy costume, I'm not the Senator's daughter, and I told the whole world what happened in my own greed for temporary fame...

    Tuesday, January 17, 2006

    Today's the day

    B*witched have a song called Rollercoaster. The lines begin, "Today's the day..."
    For those who are interested the rest of the line is "...we have to play."
    I'm excited. I'm sure everyone else is just as excited. People keep asking "Are you going to be on tv?" I have to give the same answer. "I don't know."
    I don't edit the show. I don't decide who's going to be seen and who isn't. No one knows who's going to be seen and who isn't. I predict Ayla Brown alone will have a whole 20 minute feature. LOL

    Tuesday, January 03, 2006

    "Whatever happened to the A*teens?"

    Beleive it or not someone typed an MSN search on that question. My site came up as 7th in line. Wow. It's because I sang an A*Teens song for Nigel Lythgoe, executive producer for American Idol(see "The Arrival: Part III") MJ's big blog has been directing a lot of traffic over here too:-)
    What I see happeneing around the net is the list of Hollywood names and descriptions from her site is making its rounds everywhere. Some people are copying and reposting the list and not even knowing where it came from.
    I've started to see commercials. Probably the same ones everyone else in America is seeing:-)
    Rumour has it Ayla Brown is not in the Top 24th. Coming from a comment left on DJ Slim's site. She was home in time for a basketball game. Still, one who was in Hollywood, claims she's moving on. Check out MJ's Blog for that one.
    Also, please feel free to sign my guestbook at the very bottom of the page. I'm the only one who's signed it so far...

    Wednesday, December 28, 2005

    Idol Go Home

    Check out this site. It's free and you can win prizes for guessing right each week which Idol goes home!

    Idol news, blogs, and other features. Play the game. Win the prize.

    Monday, December 19, 2005

    American Idol 5 Top 24 leaks onto net

    I can't prove any is true but I'm going along with MJ's Blog over at who gets most of her info from the Survivor Sucks EZ board.
    I once said I don't like being the source of I'm going along with them.
    American Idol 5 Top 24
    Becky O'Donahue, who I describe in "You're cute, but you can't sing." (look down the righthand scroll bar) will be singing for the votes of America. Look and listen for Becky and vote. She's a nice girl, very pretty, has class, and a cool attitude. She and her twin sister Jessie have appeared on Fear Factor and do twin modeling stuff.
    Ayla Bown from Massachusetts. I already predicted that one. Her dad's a state senator. Need I say more?
    Other names from her site....
    Ace Young
    Jose Penala
    Paris Bennett
    and a 17 year old Asian girl. Maybe she's the one I described earlier in my blog at the Convention Center with a Golden Ticket? The Asian girl I saw had a half shirt wearing a an Asian Britney Spears version of Avril Lavigne...

    Wednesday, December 14, 2005

    I'm off to Disney World!

    I've been accepted to return to Walt Disney World for a second time to earn, learn, and live. In May 2004, I arrived in Florida to be a prt of the College Program. Living in Disney housing and working in the Magic Kingdom. My program was done in January 2005 where I did not decide to extend. I applied for an Advanced Internship for the summer but was declined an invitation. In November 2005 I once again attended a presentation, traveling from Fitchburg to Salem, MA through a storm in the passenger's seat of a freind's car. (My bicycle wouldn't have gotten me too far...LOL)
    Just last week, I received my offer in the mail. I responded. I've sent my deposit. They received it. I'm to arrive in Orlando and check-in on January 16th. Ironic, one of the top rated reality shows is to premiere (which I may be apart of) the day I arrive in the world's Number 1 vactaion spot.
    Last year when I lived in Orlando, I auditioned for American Idol. You can read the entire experiance here...
    "Go back to Disney." That was Paula Abdul's final remark and final comment from the judges to me. I did. I finished my program, went back to Massachusetts and took the Electronic Media Operations and Management class for a second time, already having an Associates Degree in Broadcasting and Telecommunications 3 years earlier.
    The summer came, and the Idol universe clashed with mine. The producers remembered who I was and what I did. I was sent through to the judges for a second time. Why? Why did Nigel Lythgoe send me through? Did he already have it in mind for me to be cut? Did he think I had true potential to be in Hollywood?
    Disney remembers my AI encounter. The producers wanted to film me and another contestant, Dezmond Meeks, at our housing and our work location in the parks. Disney said no. They filmed Dezi somewhere else. They never filmed me.
    Now, I'm going back. As an Operations Cast Member.
    I was asked in my confession if I think the judges made a mistake in not choosing me to go to Hollywood. Yes. Because now I'm Mickey's bitch. 19 Entertainmnet just handed a franchise to Disney...

    Sunday, December 04, 2005

    Hollywood contestant not going?

    According to someone with the screenname Puddles80, they post the following on the Official American Idol message boards...

    "My good friend who used to post here all the time, was picked to go to Hollywood and then eliminated yesterday. They wouldn't give a reason why. I feel so bad for my friend who was packed and ready to leave this Sunday-they had already sent the tickets. If my friend is reading this, or anyone else that this happened to (I think there were several) remember how far you came-one of a selected few to get that far and we all know you are so talented. When one door closes another one opens and this will only make you stronger....
    Actually the arrival is tomorrow and someone I know you are a fan of was eliminated before she could even get on the plane-it is so unfair. She was a boardie but I doubt she will ever post here again or watch AI for that matter. She was cheated out of what she rightfully earned and I think it's just horrible. She is a really good friend of mine and the sweetest and most talented person I have ever known."

    Start your google juices MJ LOL:=) No proof if this is the same person who posted a similar message on my blog. It made me think I was being blamed for this mishap.

    Why are the negative posts usually posted by anonymous people?
    Am I being harassed? (read the comment under the Ayla Brown post)
    Is this going to appear on this coming season of American Idol. They write on the Official American Idol site that personal blogs and a "slew of surprises" are coming...

    Monday, November 21, 2005

    This is NOT the intention of my blog.

    I've done some searching and have seen people are reading my blog. That's a good thing. People use some info from my personal first hand account in their blogs and sites. That's cool too. But with all truths someone is bound to think there is something inacurate about an incredible story. A story no one will know the truth about until the season starts.
    On a site I asked the owner if he used the information he got from my blog. Here was his response.....

    What information? I mention your blog in my November 15 entry and attribute some information to you. All of my information is from other sources, which I credit. Some of the sources I credit (like survivor sucks and Idol Forums) may have gotten their information from your blog. Your blog is making the rounds. I've seen it posted on many, many AI message boards. Your blog is the source of a lot of the rumors being spread right now..........................................

    I don't like being referred to as a "source of a lot of rumours". Nothing I said is a lie. It's my story. A point of view from someone of 1 in 63. There are 63 stories of someone waking up one morning on their way to an American Idol audition. 63 stories of people making their way to the Boston Convention Center. 63 stories of bathroom uses, smiles, and hellos. 63 stories of meeting the judges....posted on this site is 1....

    Tuesday, November 08, 2005

    Boston Hollywood Contestant Speaks Out!

    At the official American Idol webpage chat forum thing, I posted an article on Ayla Brown. I then made another post entitled "ANOTHER stupid article on Ayla Brown"
    Check this response out guys and tell me what you think...

    OK folks. I just stopped by the board for the first time since my auditions and I have something to say about this.

    1st of all, I created a new profile with a fake name and a "fake" e-mail address (I used the same fake info to make the account), so don't bother to try and find out who I am. I did all of this because I did make it to Hollywood and we ARE NOT allowed to tell anyone.

    Believe me or not, I don't care. I just hope someone from the staff sees this because I am starting to get pissed. When I got my ticket I came out of the room and after celebrating with my friends I had to go wait to go give my "after" confessional. While I was waiting I called my whole immediate family and about 10 of my closes friends. After my confessional I proceded to the registration table. The first thing that was said to me was "You haven't told anyone yet have you?"

    "Ummmmm..." I said, "Not THAT many people... why?"

    "You're not supposed to tell anyone except for the people who must know, like your Mother or your employer"

    "Uh, well, I wish someone would have told me that before I went in or right after I came out but, uh OK, what I do now?"

    "Well, its not a huge problem, you just need to make sure that anyone you told understands that this information is confidential and that you could be DQ'ed if it 'gets out'"

    "OK, no prob"

    Then, along with some other ticket holders, I met with the head of PR for AI. During this meeting, the confidentiality agreement was discussed again. She told us that The most important thing was that our names DID NOT end up on the internet OR in the Press. This was for the obvious reason that AI does not want the public to know who is going to Hollywood when the show begins to air, but also because they want to make sure that every contestant has EQUAL opportunity to get press and hometown support. In other words they need to control the info so that it is FAIR.

    Now, the article that shortynspice posted does end like this:

    "As for whether or not Ayla Brown was ushered on to Hollywood, the network is keeping that a closely guarded secret until the audition show airs in January. Abdul offered the only words that could be said on that topic: 'Stay tuned.'"

    HOWEVER, This is on her school's webpage:

    Nobles News
    Ayla Brown Makes It to “American Idol”

    Ayla Brown, Class I.
    Class I talent Ayla Brown, who sings soprano in the Concert Choir, Chamber Singers and Greensleeves (the girls' a cappella group), has beat out 14,000 contestants for the final round of "American Idol," a highly rated television talent program.

    In acknowledging this accomplishment along with that of Nobles' first Pulitzer nominee, Liz Kopelman Borgwardt '82 (see related story), Head of School Robert P. Henderson, Jr. '76 said: "Nobles students are known for their academic, artistic and athletic accomplishments. These two students represent the epitome of success in all these areas."

    Ayla Brown '06, a premier vocalist as well as a nationally recognized basketball talent, is one of 32 finalists from the Eastern seaboard, beating out 14,000 over three callbacks. Her dad, State Senator Scott Brown of Norfolk, Bristol and Middlesex Counties, said of Nobles: "We're very proud and appreciative that she goes to a school that supports Ayla and her dreams."

    The auditions leading up to "the big one" before celebrity judges Paula Abdul, Ryan Seacrest and Randy Jackson had two things in common: Ayla wore her lucky blue jeans and white top at each and sang "Ain't No Mountain High Enough," made famous by Diana Ross and the Supremes. After the Boston round, Seacrest said: "There's a spirit and a spark (here) that is pretty unique." Ayla will be flown to Los Angeles for four days in early December for the final round before appearing on "American Idol."

    Among her extraordinary athletic accomplishments at Nobles, Ayla is the lead scorer in the history of girls' varsity basketball, with 1896 points; she was the most valuable player in the ISL (Independent School League) last year and has led Nobles to back-to-back ISL titles. In addition to her considerable talents as a solo artist, Ayla has always been deeply involved in Nobles' Choral Program.

    Date: 10/28/2005


    OK. That's it. I would love to have my former school do a story on me and start getting support in my community, I have a relationship with a local Morning Radio show and would love to do an interview with them.. But I am not as special as Miss Ayla, so I don't get to.

    I am not going to rat her out to the producers, because Karma can be rough. But I had to vent about this. It is SO wrong.

    End of Rant.

    Sunday, October 30, 2005

    "You're cute, but you can't sing." Randy Jackson

    I guess the headline says it all. Should I write my experiance? I guess this is the end of the blog:-(
    The 5:45a.m. train leaving from Fitchburg didn't leave at 5:45. There were mechanical errors. It left just before 6. The next stop was at North Leominster. It overshot it's stop and had to back up. Whoever heard of a train backing up?!? That shows how ghetto central Mass. is.
    I arrived in Boston circa 7:40. I was told to be at the Boston Convention Center by 7. I knew though that there would be a lot of waiting. A lot.
    I took a cab and the traffic ran up the meter. I told him don't bother driving across the bridge, I'll get out run across the street, go up the stairs, and go across the bridge myself. I probably saved myself $3 all the while wasting a $10 bill when I could have caught the underground for $1.25. I was in fear of being late.
    That fear left when I entered, presented my green paper to security, went upstairs and viewed a long line of hopefuls. And I rushed?!?
    We were seated in a room. Assigned seats actually. There were 7 rows of contestants with about 10 in each row. The actual number of contestants was either 63 or 70. A good number of those contestants were from New York.
    When I first entered, I saw a girl who I recognized from the Boston Herald. Becky O'Donahue. She's a twin. 25. New York. Her and her twin, Jessie who was present but not a contestant, were on Fear Factor a few years ago. I started talking to her telling her I know who she is and stuff.
    My seat was right behind her's. She was in row 5. I was in row 6. Later I left to use the bathroom, which I did a zillion times through the day, and when I came back a man was talking to her. He was complementing her presence and sophistication. He was the parent of someone. He then asked her "Do you play sports? My daughter...-"
    "Are you Senator Brown?" I asked.
    "Am I Senator Brown? Yes, I'm Senator Brown."
    I rolled my eyes at him. "Ugh" I said. Then I took it back. "Well, I didn't mean it like that," I tried to explain. He smiled and said it was okay. When he left I asked O'Donahue if she knew that was the Senator. She said she didn't. She felt like she was talking to someone's dad. Ummm...she was.
    Hours later a girl, from New York, and I were on our way outside. On our way down the corridor, guess who was coming up the corridor with a crew of cameras following. Paula Abdul herself. Twirling in front of the cameras and acting stupid. Even though I met her before in Orlando, I became temporarily star struck. I kept walking straight. Staring at the crew and watching how silly she was being. I kept walking straight for the crew. The girl I was with pulled my arm. "Come on. To the left, to the left," she was telling me. My jaw was still ajar but I kept a straight posture as we walked past Paula Abdul. There was eye contact and I looked at her like she was stupid and she returned the look like "Oh the contestants saw me."
    Going towards the escalator we could see men in black through the window. This entourage coming out of the limo included Randy Jackson and Simon Cowell.
    We went down the escalator and we said to the female security "Did you see Paula?" She said she did and Paula was acting stupid. She said Paula hid behind her and her partner "hiding" from the camera saying "You can't see me." Duh
    On our way out the building my attention and eyes focused on Simon. He had a coffee in his hand. Starbucks I beleive. I can't be sure. He walked in the Convention Center and looked up and around like he was an inspector making sure the roof wasn't going to fall on him.
    Later, AI producers were telling everyone to get back in thier seats. Camera crews surrounded the door and I knew what was happening. Paula was gonna come in and speak to everyone. She entered and everyone cheered and clapped. She gave a pep talk and at the end she said ...."cuz we want to give you a..." and she made a square with her hands and I yelled out "Golden Ticket!!" She looked at me, pointed and gave me the thumbs up. "That's right," she said. Then she left.
    Later all three judges came in for a pep talk again. They began saying things like "Argue your case." "We do change our minds." Yeah right. I felt that they were saying these things to get people rowled up to give television what television wants. Angry people begging for a reverse decision.
    Ryan Seacrest was last to enter and do his thing. He said something like don't try to read the judges because we'll never know what they are thinking. He said just keep singing no matter what they do. They may look at us like we are aliens. They may not be looking at us at all. He was right.
    Later the first Golden Ticket winner entered the room with Seacrest building up the excitement. He was like "I know you guys are saying 'yeah that's great for her but I want one'." I told him "Yeah, that's exactly what I'm thinking!!" He wore a sweater that said Royal Flush on the back. I asked him if he played poker and he said I was the second person to ask him that. The answer is no and he didn't even know it was on his sweater until someone asked him. My guess is, he was dressed by someone else.
    The girl, I don't know her name had golden curly hair. She was pretty. There were actually two girls with golden hair. One had braids, the other girl's hair was natural.
    Each contestant was seen individually for a camera interview and for a pre-judge confession. By 12:30 only 9 contestants had Golden Tickets which were exchanged for Green papers. Only about 3 rows had auditioned.
    The production stopped for a one hour lunch break. I went to lunch with the two guys in foil. They will definatly be on TV so you will definatly know who I'm talking about. Actually when I was going outside they were being escorted by security. I got the story from them. The judges had them sing a duet. Once they got their no, outside the doors for the cameras, one of the two took off his foil helmet, grazed his foot on the ground like a bull or horse ready to attack, and ran straight for the camera bumrushing it with his "weapon". Security escorted them towards the exit and that's when I ran into them in the corridor. We left together and then came back about half and hour later.
    The judges had a press conference during lunch. It was leaked Simon said he was disgusted at the talent here in Boston. Maybe that's why 1/3 of the room was from New York:-) LOL
    It was just prior to 2:00p.m. Very shortly after my lunch it was my turn for my personal interview. I was recognized from last year and told to say my name and where I'm from and what I do. I was asked what it would mean to me to go to Hollywood. What happened last year? How will I approach the judges this year? What am I all about? What's the "B" around my neck stand for? Hold it up to the camera. I went into an explanation about two missing holes in the B. I made reference to the camera man probably having digital zoom. I remember finishing my interview by saying "I'm gonna be me, but a toned down me."
    You can read last year's experiance at
    For those who are interested in comparing last year to this year.
    Hours later it was time for my confessional. While waiting, Golden Tickets crossed my path. A chinese girl. A black chick with a long ponytail. Also, a girl with golden curly hair who I know the name is Brianna Taylor. She smokes Newports.
    Jenny Anderson, I recognized her picture from the Herald. I saw her walking down the corridor with a Golden Ticket. I put the name and face together.
    Of course the senator's daughter, Ayla Brown, made it earlier in the day. She was the only one in the contestant room wearing a huge Patriots blanket like she was too cool to wear a jacket.
    Becky O'Donahue, who I was rooting for, made it. I hope she beats out Ayla Brown. Becky O'Donahue is my fave for Idol. And I hope she reads this blog.
    And the best thing happened. There was another set of twins. They were annoying. When the judges came in the room earlier they were totally acting obnoxious and trying to get everyone to do a spirit cheer. I yelled out "Shut up!! Sit down!!" Me and some other people went 1, 2, 3 "NO SPIRIT CHEER!!!" People laughed.
    Well, while waiting for confession a , no offense, huge girl went in. She was in there for like 5 seconds before the Spirit twins came down the hall crying. "Yes!" I exclaimed. A producer opened the confessional door and told the other producer to take whoever was in there out cuz they wanted to get the twins RIGHT NOW while they were still crying and carrying on. It was sad but funny. Then some guy was running full force to the bathroom and a camera ran with him. He ran full force back to the judging area. Seconds later he ran by again full force to the bathroom. "What the hell is he doing?" people were wondering. I now know the boy is Michael Sandecki.
    After confessional me, a girl I call Brooklyn, and a boy went to look for somewhere to warm up. I already did that in the bathroom down stairs but I joined for the heck of it. We were soon. We went to a room that the producers and crew ate in earlier in the day. There were still pie pieces on a table and coffee and hot water. We all poured a cup of hot water and I put a lemon in mine. And we each took a package of honey.
    It was time. It was nearly 5:00 pm. We went back to the contestant waiting room where only like 20 people remained. My how the room emptied since the day began. Ken Warwick came in the room for a pep talk. He said the contestants are starting to get boring because they are just coming in and singing their song like this ( he was speaking in a monotone). He said we needed to keep up the energy. We've been there all day in our best clothes waiting for our 3 minutes in front of the judges. We were tired, hungry, and losing energy. We pepped ourselves up with a game of Simon says. We said "Let's pretend it's 7 a.m. and we just got here." We started cheering and clapping just to pump ourselves up. Next 5.
    Me, Brooklyn, a German girl, an adorible 16 year old boy who I now know is Colton Rudloff, and another girl with curly hair was in the group of 5. We sat outside the judges' door.
    A boy with huge nerd glasses wearing a half cut shirt with Mickey Mouse on it had his crew of friends. Like 20 or 30 people there just for him. I know he's going on tv. His shirt was half cut revealing his floppy belly. His contestant number had to cover Mickey Mouse. He went in and came out ranting and raving about how the judges didn't appreciate Metallica. Seacrest was there in the midst of his friends and said something like they're here to support you. Group hug.
    A few contestants later it was my turn. The camera was on me. I got up, paused. The producer was rushing me. "Go in. They're ready."
    I had a flashback. When I was in the Army we were training for rifle qualification day. You only have one chance. Before the targets come someone asks over the tower megaphone, "Drill sergeants ready? Soldiers ready?" or something to that effect. They can't start until everyone gives the okay. Our Drill Sgt. used to say, take your time getting the sand bags right. If a drill sergeant is yelling at you just say "ummhmm whatever" and don't start until you are comfortable. I took that advice.
    The producer was saying "Come on, they're ready."
    "Yeah, Yeah," I was thinking. I was about to walk in but I stopped and turned back. I stared in the air and took a deep breath. Then I started for the doors again...
    "Hello," "Hello."
    The judges had a different seating arrangement than usual. Simon was on the far left where Randy usually sits. Paula was still in the middle and Randy was to the far right where Simon used to sit.
    "Hi Paula," I said. She was looking down. Then she gave me a delayed reaction. "Yo!" she said still looking down at her paper.
    "We've seen you before," stated Randy looking at me with one eye big as if he was Sherlock Holmes.
    "Yes" I smiled.
    "Where?" he asked.
    "Orlando." I said. Then my personality began to come out. I started speaking really fast. "Remember? I had the microphone headset?" I made a motion with my hand around my head and across the side of my cheek.
    All three looked at me expressionless. I stopped talking.
    I can't exactly remember exact words that were said after that. I believe Randy asked if I was in the Armed Forces. I said "Yeah I was in the Army," but I didn't sound too happy or proud of being there.
    A few more questions before Paula asked "What will you be singing for us?"
    "Janet Jackson's Together Again" I beamed.
    "Uh-Oh. That's Paula's favorite artist," exclaimed Simon.
    I could tell they were being sarcastic. They joked on it for a minute. I guess Paula and Janet are rivals. I do know that Paula choreographed for Janet back in the day. I also made reference to that last year.
    I began singing.
    "There are times when I look above and beyond...."
    Paula Abdul was paying me no attention. She held a paper up to her face and was chatting with Simon and laughing and giggling. Simon was talking back with her. She was looking at the director Nigel and smiling, still with the paper to her face, and shaking her head no. Was she talking about me? Then I remembered Seacrest's speech.
    I looked over at Randy who was the only one paying attention.
    "When I feel that I don't belong draw my strength..."
    Finally somewhere in the middle of my performance Paula exaggeratly looks up. It scared me.
    "Dream about us together again baby. What I want us together again baby. I know we'll be together again cuz everywhere I go, every smile I see, I know you are there smiling back at me. Dancing in moonlight I know you are free, cuz I "
    "Okay you can stop," said Simon.
    I faded the last words.
    "Miranda. I believe the other judges will agree with me when I say you sang that song better than Janet Jackson."
    "Really?" I beamed. That was fantastic coming from Simon. "Thank you," I gleed.
    He sat back and put his hands above his head. They all stared at me expressionless. There was a pause.
    "I'm kidding," he said.
    "Oh." My heart fell.
    "That was terrible."
    "Really?" I cried.
    "No, that was good," he said.
    "No, that was horrible."
    I was confused. Was it good or bad? I wanted this game to end.
    "It was terrible," said Simon.
    The other judges agreed.
    "Would I lie to you?" he asked.
    "No," I choked out.
    "Would Randy lie? Would Paula lie?" he asked.
    "No," I softly said.
    I can't remeber exactly what happened. I think Paula said "I think she's shocked at you Simon."
    "No," I said. I can't remember what I said after that.
    Simon asked me about choreography. Like why I didn't do any or something to that effect. I wanted to explain how the song was a last minute decision. There was a lot I wanted to say to answer that question. I started a word of a sentence stopped, started again. I was thinking of what to say. I was choked up.
    Then Paula made fun of me. "Uh,guh uh duh uh uhgah," said Paula. She was looking down again. I got red.
    "Do you want me to do some choreography?" I asked Simon. "I can"
    "No, thats' alright," he said.
    "Do you want me to sing another song? I can sing another song," I offered.
    "No, don't sing," said Simon.
    Randy said I was out of key and my voice sounded vibrato. He made a motion to his throat. They way the French say F-you.
    "Paula, what do you think?" I begged to her.
    She looked up. "Hmm?" she looked around like who called my name. She shook her head at me. I can't remember her exact words but whatever they were didn't help.
    Then Simon asked me "Who are you here with?"
    "I'm here alone. My mother was too sick to come," I said.
    "Who told you you could sing?" asked Simon.
    "Everyone," I said
    "What do they say when they hear you?" He asked.
    "They say 'wow' and 'good job'-"
    "Are you willing to sing out in public?"
    "Yes! Do you want me to go out there and sing and bring you back ten people-"
    "No, that deal's already been done," said Simon
    "You know what? There was a guy that came up to me today outside when I was practicing--"
    "Ooooh a guy," giggled Paula.
    They started making fun of me again.
    "What can I do to get better?"
    "Stop singing," said Simon.
    "Give me some feedback," I asked.
    Randy said "What more feedback do you want? You can't sing. You're out of key. You're not a singer." Then he paused.
    "You said we wouldn't lie to you, right?" asked Simon. "Would we lie?"
    "No," I choked out again.
    "Look," said Randy," you're cute, but you can't sing."
    Then Paula said "You have an access television show. So that shows you have creativity."
    "Yes!!" I piped up. "And I can use that creativity in Hollywood!"
    "No, no, no, no, not in this competition you won't," she said.
    "Can you act?" asked Simon
    I looked at him. A flashback came. A friend told me they might have me in mind for another show. Last year in Orlando, I got a no from the judges but weeks later they wanted to do a story on me. Why? I wasn't going to Hollywood. This year they wanted to do a story on me but the Nor'Easter scared them away. Do the producers have something in mind for me that has nothing to do with this competition?
    "I can." I said. "I want to be a popstar. Please just give me a chance."
    "No, no, no"
    "Don't you want to work with me?"
    "No, no, no"
    "Listen, " I started singing again. "There are times when I look above and beyond-"
    "Stop singing," said Simon. "Randy, yes or no?"
    "No," Randy said firmly.
    "Paula please, please, Paula please?" I begged.
    "Paula?" asked Simon.
    She shook her head. "No," she softly said.
    "Thank-you," said Simon.
    I exited the room to be greeted by cameras. "They want me to get mad and cry and punch the cameras. I'm not going to give them what they want?"
    "Why not?" asked a producer. It will get you on tv."
    "No, " I said. "It just makes you look more stupid when you do all that and I'm not going on tv looking stupid."
    I grabbed my coat from by the window and walked down the corridor.
    I went to my after-judge confessional in which at one point I referred to the judges as "jerks". Other than that I think I was pretty calm.
    Walking down the corridor, I walked past an AI camera. "I'm sure you guys will have a great season," I attempted a failed smiled.
    Becky O'Donahue was still around. "Good luck Donahue!" I yelled.
    I lingered around for a minute. The girl right after me got a Golden Ticket. Brooklyn didn't get one. We walked downstairs together.
    I went outside, walked ten feet, and came back in. I asked the security guard how to get to the underground. He pointed straight. I made my way to North Station. My train was at 7:35. Twelve hours later from when I first arrived.
    The season starts in January. If my clip is shown, someone somewhere out there will see me.

    Wednesday, October 26, 2005

    Tommorrow is Judgment Day

    Once again I got my hair done. Fresh from the salon, but now after a night's sleep it needs a little touching up. My sister will take care of that later on tonight...
    *sigh* Tonight. Supposedly an American Idol crew will be waiting for me when I get home from school today. At least today is a nice day out compared to yesterday's leftover Wilma storm mixed with the Nor'Easter.
    There are little snow flurries on the trees and ground in Gardner (where I go to school). I also hear there is some snow in New Hampshire. Wow.
    Anyways, it was discussed they want to tape me riding my jacked up bike to work. I'm not even on the schedule to work. If I go to work I want to punch in and get paid. No free labor even if it is for the camera:-) I don't know anything that's going to happen this afternoon. I'm not a psychic. But I did get a vision of Hollywood...

    Monday, October 24, 2005

    Article from the Boston Herald

    No `Idol' tune: Nervous hopefuls gear up for audition with Randy, Paula and Simon
    By Lauren Beckham Falcone
    Monday, October 24, 2005 - Updated: 12:15 AM EST

    Brace yourself, Boston. The terrible trio of Fox talent scouts - Randy Jackson, Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell - descend upon the city Thursday to skewer or send ``American Idol'' hopefuls to Hollywood.
    ``I'm really nervous about what Simon might say to me,'' said Ayla Brown, 17, of Wrentham. ``And worse, I'm sick. I have an ear infection, sinus infection and a cold. So, I'm on antibiotics and Sudafed and saying a lot of prayers my voice will be OK.''
    Brown, who beat out thousands of ``Idol'' wannabes in August at Gillette Stadium in Foxboro, seems to be a favorite already - ``American Idol'' crews were busy taping her ``back story'' for hours on Wednesday - a week before her tryout in front of the threesome.
    ``It's a random selection,' said ``American Idol'' spokeswoman Alexandra Gillespie, adding that about 100 contestants have been invited to the Boston Convention & Exhibitor Center to belt out tunes in front of the judges Thursday.
    Those who impress get the golden ticket to Tinseltown, but don't expect to read a list of names here - selections are on the QT until ``Idol's'' fifth season starts in January.
    Brown, who was one of the Herald's picks to make it to Hollywood, said she's prepared for her shot at stardom.
    ``I've been taking lessons with a vocal instructor who's helped me come up with some good songs and routines,'' she said. ``I'm going to sing `Ain't No Mountain High Enough' and have a few others in mind for backup.''
    For luck, she's wearing a special necklace and bringing her parents, Rep. Scott Brown (R-Wrentham) and WCVB-TV (Ch. 5) reporter Gail Huff.
    `I feel like the worst thing they could say is `Stick to basketball' '' said Brown, who has a basketball scholarship to Boston College. ``That would offend me.''
    Becky O'Donahue, 25, of Dobbs Ferry, N.Y., is trying not to dwell on the stress of performing. She's thankful she doesn't have to think about what she'll wear - contestants are required to sport the same outfit they wore in August.
    ``I'm just practicing my song, getting a million possibilities together,'' she said. ``I'm taking it easy and resting my voice and not thinking about it too much.'' [continue]
    The Boston hopefuls have plenty of competition - the ``Idol'' judges are also checking out the talent in San Francisco; Austin, Texas; Chicago; Denver; and Greensboro, N.C.

    Thursday, October 20, 2005

    Idol producers contact contestants to give info!

    Last night I received a phone call. Actually, I missed it. I had to call it back. It was only a 5 minute time span though. Enough time for my niece to announce the area code and everyone to ponder where it was from. My brother and I were arguing on the porch while my mom sat next to me listening to the message on the phone. I was about to say something to him but my mom put her hand up to me which signaled me to stop. I bit my tongue for about 10 seconds before I started to tell him off again.
    "Listen to this," my mom said passing me the phone. I listened. It was a lady who claimed to be an AI producer trying to contact me wondering for possible taping and interviewing for next week. Call her office at xxx-xxx-xxxx.
    I called her back. I forgot her last name but whoever answered asked for my first and last name. I told her. In 2 seconds I was connected with who I needed to be talking to.
    She identified who she was and I did the same. She asked me what my schedule is usually like. I told her I go to school in the day and work at night. She asked about Wednesday. I told her I thought audition day was Wednesday. I requested Tuesday and Wednesday off from work. She asked me if another Producer called yet. I told her no. She said another producer was supposed to call all the contestants to inform them the judges round for Boston is all taking place on Thursday. Some people were split between the two days. I was a little skeptical about the complete change of plans for me.
    We continued to talk about my work. She said she was going to call the store manager of where I worked to ask if they could come tape me at work. I still have yet to verify if a phone call came there or not. I'll find out tommorrow. I'm off tonight.
    Anyways, I told her they could come to the poker game this Friday night but she said they'll be in New York this Friday. Hmm, they must have another contestant they want to do a story on too. Maybe it's the girl I referred to as "Brooklyn" in "The Arrival: Part III"...
    Well, today about a half hour after I got home from school, there was a phone call for me. Another Idol producer. She said something about she was trying to find my number but it was left in her book which was in the truck or van which was in Georgia:-?
    Whatever. She was calling to tell me the audition day is Thursday. I told her I had found out yesterday but thanked her for being late with her job. I asked her about the whole AI thing wanting to come film me in Fitchburg. She said they probably want to do a hometown story on me but she doesn't know and/or isn't involved with that. Her job was just to call the contestants and let them know audition day is Thursday.
    They are so mysteriuos in the way they operate. Last year, in Orlando when they postponed the judges round due to the hurricanes, we received a phone call saying the round has been postponed. Days later a phone call asking for the nearest airport to our house. I mean they were acting like federal agents on a classified mission.
    "What's the nearest airport to your house?"
    "Orlando International"
    "Okay thank you"
    "That's it? Where are we going? When are we leaving?"
    "I don't know. My job is just to ask what airport is nearest your house."
    Same principle is applying now. At least I got a second phone call though that verified audition day is not Wednesday. Wouldn't it have sucked if it really was and I didn't go? But now there are new plans for Wednesday.
    I have a confession. My bike is a piece of crap. They want to tape me riding my bike in the 2nd hilliest city in the nation. I've been meaning to take it to the bike shop. I need like a bran new derailer (spelling?) and my gears all fixed. They're broken. The chain sometimes doesn't go. *sigh* Things cost money. Hopefully though, I'll get it fixed before Wednesday.
    Wouldn't it suck if I go through the effort to fix it and they decide to do a story on someone else or just forget about me? This competition. It's stressing my brain. I love it:-)

    Wednesday, October 19, 2005

    Fame coming...will it all be over? wants my blog on their site. DJ Slim over at has my blog listed. Soon others will follow. The newspaper articles, the smiles in the school hallways, the waves of hellos on my way to work, will it all end in one week? Or will it keep growing? More smiles, more pictures, more questions...
    Last year when I auditioned in Orlando, I missed running out of the doors into the circle of flashes, cameras, and microphones. When I got a "no, no" from the judges, it was all over. But I can feel it coming back...

    Tuesday, October 18, 2005


    Fix this mess that happened at the top of my blog. I can't seem to find the e-mail of the technical support team. I was just nosing around in the template section. I must've accidently deleted something or added something. But I can't find it and I don't want to add any more mess to the mess that's alreday created. Please can someone help?!?!?!!?

    Tuesday, October 11, 2005

    The Arrival: Part III

    ... I awoke to Audrey telling me to wake up. (see "The Arrival: Part I" to know 'Audrey')It was time to roll up the sleeping bags. The rumours were false. Bags and the sort could stay in the stadium and there was no 3a.m cattle call outside. I went to the bathroom and the once vacant space became flooded with girls in stalls and over the sinks brushing their teeth, washing their face and combing their hair. Girls were looking for outlets for blowdryers and hair straighteners.
    After I was done touching up, Norman and I decided to go halves on french fries and an orange juice. At this time in the morning (I'll say 5a.m. ish?) there was only one concession stand open for food. One or two. The lines were long. Maybe about 100 in each line. What seemed like a half hour later we were able to get some expensive food. We then headed towards section 125, to our stadium seats.
    The stadium began filling as people began to take their seats. Some, like me, were there for two days, sleeping in the rain and on the hard concrete of the stadium grounds, others had gone to nearby hotels, yet many slept in their cars. And yes, even on audition day, people were still coming in to be registered for an audition.
    Instructions were being shouted for all media to leave the stadium. It was now a half stadium full of hopefulls, a good 10, ooo strong, and the American Idol producers come to find their next popstar. The show had begun.
    "Singing in the Rain" wasn't particularly a favorite song of the crowd but the producers demanded we sing it over and over again while twirling our umbrellas. What a cliche` song given the events of the past two days. And as karma would have it, the skies began to rain...again. Suddenly the process began.
    Beginning with section 125, the rows got up, single filedly walked down the stairs, and handed off their stadium seating ticket along with their release form to an Idol producer. Being in row 16 of section 125 it wasn't too long before I found myself, walking in a line past one of the Patriots ' endzones to get my picture taken and then find a place to stand in one of the rows of four in front one of 16 tables across the other side of the field. Each table had two judges.
    Walking past table 2 I saw Angelica doing her thing. She didn't get passed through though. Norman and I stood in the same row of four. He was third, I was fourth. Fourth, just like last year.
    I said "I'm gonna start in the middle somewhere." The female judge on my left said "Okay. You can do what you want." I began Christina Aguilera's "The Voice Within" with the words" in a world where innocence is quickly claimed, it's so hard to stand your ground when you're so afraid. No one reaches out a hand for you to hold. When you look outside look inside to your soul. When there's no one else, look inside yourself. Like your oldest friend just truuuuu---crack--"Oh NO!!" I gasped. I turned my head away in shame. "No, no," my judge said, "that was good. Just control your nerves. Take a deep breath and start again." But before she finished coaxing me, I began searching for a tone..."I fall without my wings, "I began to crescendo," I feel so small, I guess I need you baby. And everytime I see you in my dreams I see your face, it's haunting me. I guess I need you baby."
    "Okay, okay you can stop. What song was that?"
    "Britney Spears Everytime," I said. "I knew I heard that song before!" she exclaimed. For the first time I saw life and expression in that judge.
    I stepped back with the other 3 people in my row. The two judges at our table held the stack of golden papers in front of their mouths while they convened. Then coming back from thier "meeting" the girl judge thanked everyone for being there, said they were looking for something different. Then she went on to say "You three are going to get your wristbands cut and go that way." Norman said "Three?" She pointed and counted out "one, two, three."
    I made it past the first round.
    I went to the "winner's lounge" to fill out some paperwork and take a picture. My Golden Ticket was traded for a blue paper. On it were instructions for the next round with Nigel Lythgoe, executive producer of American Idol.
    I and my blue paper began to walk to the stadium exit. On the way another "winner" met me and we held arms and skipped towards the iron gated arch where we were greeted by journalists, reporters, and other onlookers.
    ROUND 2
    AT 5:35 a.m. the next morning, I once again boarded the train headed to Boston. The location: The Seaport Hotel. One Idol contestant compared this section of Boston to lower Manhattan. The girl of course is from New York. Brooklyn to be exact. That's what I call her. Brooklyn.
    Nearly 200 contestants filled the large room designated for us at the Seaport Hotel. We were given lyrics to a song called "Joy to the World." It also played on repeat over and over and over again. I didn't bother to remember anything as Ken Warwick (Assistant Executive) told us it wouldn't affect our audition one bit. Yeah right.
    We were individually seen by an 'Idol producer for more questioning and interviewing. Then it was audition time. About 10 people sat in a row of chairs outside the audition room. As 5 left 5 more were added. Two people before my time and this (no offense) white, rapper guy was thrust into a seat next to me. He came late. He just arrived and in less than 5 minutes he was to rap for the executive producer of American Idol. He walked in and walked out carrying a Golden Ticket. No one cheered. Everyone looked at him with shock. He rapped for the camera then we all cheered. I got up and walked in.
    "You're back," stated Nigel wearing headphones and sitting with a panel of producers all with headphones. I walked towards my T in the middle of the floor. "None of this, this time?" he asked making motions to an imaginary "microphone headset" around his head in reference to what I wore in front of the judges last year.
    "No," I smiled.
    "Natural?" He asked.
    "Yes, " I said.
    "Why are you here?" he asked.
    "Well, it's been a year," I began. "I'm a year older. A year more mature..."
    "Okay," he said. "What are you going to sing?"
    "I'm going to sing Cristina Aguilera's The Voice Within"
    "OOh, I don't think you can do that." He took his head phones off and asked a lady on the panel "Can we do Christina Aguilera?" She said no.
    He said I couldn't do Xtina A. because American Idol doesn't have the rights to any of her music. "Oh, change of plan then." I paused. "How about Britney?"
    "Yeah, you can do Britney. What song?"
    "I'm gonna have to go with Everytime." I began singing. I don't think I finished the first chorus before Nigel stopped me and asked me if I had another song.
    "The A*Teens," I said.
    "The A*Teens?!?" Nigel asked with this puzzled look on his face.
    "Fools Rush In," I said.
    "Oh Fools Rush In. Okay," he said.
    I began singing. "Wise man say only fools rush in, but I can't help falling in love with you. Shall I stay? Would it be a scene, if I can't help falling in love with you?"
    I was stopped. This time way before the chorus. Was this a good thing?
    "Miranda, how much of Joy to the World did you remember?"
    "You know what? When I walked in here today and got this paper, it was the first time I've ever seen this song. I don't know it."
    "How about a line or something?"
    "I don't know any of it. I heard the chorus playing over and over again-"
    "Sing that."
    "I don't know it all."
    "Sing what you know"
    "Joy to the world...uh Joy to the world...I don't know it."
    "None of it?"
    "You know what. Jeremiah was a bullfrog!!" I sarcastically growled.
    He then leaned over and grabbed a piece of paper. "I happen to have a copy of it right here."
    "So you're gonna read it to me?" I hissed.
    "Just the chorus," he said. "Joy to the world. (something something) boys and girls. To all the fishes of the deep, blue sea joy to you and me." He looked up.
    "Start when I'm ready?" I asked.
    "mm hmm," he answered.
    "Joy to the world. To all the boys and gir ir ir irls. *pause* And all the fishes of the deep blue sea, joy to you and me! Like that?"
    "mm hmm"
    "okay, good." I held my breath
    "Miranda how far did you make it last year?"
    Uh oh. Why was he asking. "Well, uh-"
    "Did you make it to the judges?"
    "You made it to the judges."
    "You made it here, right?" I thought that question was redundant. If I made it to the judges of course I made it there. Why was he asking?
    "Yes," I said through clenched teeth.
    "You made it to the judges?"
    "Yes." I was beginning to get annoyed.
    "You saw them?"
    "You're gonna see them again."
    I wasn't expected that one. It was like getting a piercing done before inhaling. I let out a scream and ran towards Nigel. "Where's my Golden Ticket?!?" I screamed. He looked up and pointed towards the door, "Down there"
    I ran down the panel trying to find who will hand me a ticket. I got to the end and sitting by the door a lady waved a Golden Ticket for me to grab. I grabbed it, squealed a thank you, and bolted out the door.
    A camera was there to greet me. I jumped and twirled in front of it then went to the next area for "winners" where we endured more individual interviews and finally another ticket exchange. We had to give up the Golden Ticket for a green paper.
    Randy, Paula, and Simon is the next round. On October 26th I will be in front of them again singing "Can't Fight the Moonlight" by Leann Rhymes.
    Everyday I visualize those three people standing about 10 feet in front of me. In less than two weeks it's going to happen...

    Monday, October 03, 2005

    3 Weeks, 2 Days

    The time is approaching fast. Randy Jackson, Paula Abdul, and Simon Cowell. I will come face to face with them again. Sure, I expect that they will recognize me again. Nigel did. (coming up in "The Arrival: Part III") 3 weeks. That's 3 more paychecks. Most of which is going on my phone, bus fare, my hair, and train fair.
    I bought my textbook for class today even though school started a month ago. I've been going to Criminal Law without a book. I've even been assigned a case on page 122 without having page 122. It's cool now though becuase I paid $75.15 to have a used version of page 122.

    Monday, September 19, 2005

    The Arrival: Part II

    ...There were tables in front of the door entrances. Long ones. Bags were briefly searched. A group of 30 to 50 people at a time. A lane was reserved for the handicapped as well as a reserved lane for people without bags. After being filtered in we walked to the beginning of a corridor where there was a tble and people handing out the wristbands. Was it pink and green? One for contestants. The other for guests. I believe the green one was for contestants...
    ID's were shown and wristbands were received.
    We moved down to the next set of tables and stadium tickets were being handed out. Tickets that had your seat on it. For anyone familiar with Foxboro Stadium, being among the first to arrive I, Audrey, Norman, and Angelica had a seat in section 125. The first section for the American Idol auditions. (For those who haven't read "The Arrival" the pre-mentioned names of my companions are explained in that blog. Click on "The Arrival" located on the right side bar to read it.)
    Arriving in section 125 row 16 we were happy to finally sit down...unfortunately, the stadium is an open field and we were not covered. The drizzling rain continued. Once section 125 filled, we were given a speech on people with wristbands can leave the Stadium and come back tommorrow by 5a.m. I didn't hear much. I had leaned on Norman's shoulder once I sat and fell asleep. I woke when I saw, or felt, people moving. We were free to go. I gathered with my new found friends in the corridor in front of our section and watched as people began to unravel sleeping bags, utilize the restrooms, stand in food lines, and sit on the ground.
    "Do you want to sleep on my bag?" Norman asked me. My pants were wet. My pillow, towel, and sweatshirt soaked. I hung them on a rail next to other shirts, and pants, and socks, I laid down on the concrete ground on top of the sleeping bag and fell into a deep sleep.
    Unknowingly, I was photographed. So was my pillow.
    When I awole it was around 1 or 2 in the afternoon it was still so early. I was hungry, and still wet from the rains of the night before we were let into the stadium. It was loud. Karaoke was happening somewhere in the middle of the corridor.
    Outside people were still coming in. The same speech I heard hours earlier were still being repeated to each filling section. News crews couldn't keep themselves away from the growing crowds.
    Being on a limited budget stadium prices weren't calculated with reality of hunger. A small french fry at a stadium price will not quinch your hunger. Until you are really hungry. Audrey had brought a cake, and cookies, bottled water, and juice. She was kind enough to share. I remember being awoken by Norman to the sight of chicken selects. How sweet:-)
    As the evening wore on, Karaoke subsided. The crowd began to thin as people made their way to their cars to sleep for the night. Others drove to their hotels. Many were fast asleep in their bags. Small groups gathered in song. Other groups were smoking outside the gates.
    Rumours began to fly that at 3 a.m. they were kicking everybody out the stadium to do a line up for 5 a.m. What's worse, NO BAGS were to be brought in. Later (around midnight later) those rumours were finally squashed.
    Somewhere between 10 and 11p.m. I went to the restrooms when it was very quiet. Only a couple went to this 20 stall bathroom every once in a while. I began to wash my body and start to get dressed. I did my makeup and did some voice warming stuff.
    Other people were starting to get dressed too. I went back to sleep and just hours after midnight, I had my final awakening...

    Wednesday, September 07, 2005

    The presidents office! Noon.

    I'm standing in line waiting to pay for a small plate of home fries. A lady comes up behind me. She's congratulating me on the article she read in the Worcester Telegram and Gazette yesterday. The news is quickly getting around. I will be in front of the American Idol judges this October.
    I'm not sure who said what and I don't want to start any he said she said here, so I'm saying I was told by her pictures wanted to be taken of me for our school's public affairs department. Mount Wachusett Community College. Gardner, Massachusetts. The bus broke down this morning.
    I told her my class is at 12:30p.m. It's my first class of the day. My only class of the day. Today is the second day of school. Yesterday was the first. I don't have a book for my class. I don't have any money for a book for my class.
    I knew I wanted some computer time before I get into the zone. That's why I'm here now. I'll be at the president's door at noon.

    Saturday, September 03, 2005

    The arrival

    Arriving in Boston, Ma on Monday August 29th, I asked around for directions to South Station. I had my bike with me and couldn't bring it on the Green Line. The Orange Line was down. I made it there and saw a woman and young gentlemen waiting on a side bench. They had clothes on a hanger, covered. It was obvious where they were catching the next train to. At 10:25p.m. the Attleboro line left South Station Boston and arrived in Mansfield just after 11:00p.m. I looked at the couple. "You guys going to Foxboro?" We circled around. No cabs, no buses.
    Another young lady from New York was standing on the platform. Audrey and Norman as I later learned are from New Jersey. We all pitched in $7:50 to pay for the $30 cab ride to Gillete Stadium in Foxboro. We arrived minutes after midnight making it officially Tuesday October 30th.
    Once in line there were less than 100 people. A blue tarp covered the most of the first aisle. I'm guessing it rained. Soon after I didn't have to guess anymore. Prepared with a pillow, a towel, and a sweatshirt in my duffel bag, I stretched out on the grass and prepared to catch some z's. The first trickle of rain began not more than 30 minutes later. There were about 15 more people in line.
    Audrey and Norman had lawn chairs. Audrey had an umbrella. She offered for me to sit on a bag next to her chair and lean under the umbrella. It began to rain...then pour. Some girls had a box of trashbags. I asked for one and Audrey helped me put it on.
    I was lucky to have been wearing my military boots. They kept the rain out for the first 2 hours of downpour. After that the wetness from my pants was to much and it began to seep down into my boots.
    For 4 hours it rained. Not more than 300 people endured the downfall. Some had tents. Others had umbrellas and raincoats. Some had nothing.
    By 6 a.m. the rain had subsided and nearly 1000 people were in line with the crowd still flowing in. By 8 a.m. the line began to filter into Gillette Stadium...

    Friday, September 02, 2005

    News article

    Hopeful hundreds audition to be next 'American Idol'
    By JENNETTE BARNES, Standard-Times staff writer FOXBORO --

    "American Idol" started a new season of famously brutal auditions yesterday with a massive cattle call at Gillette Stadium. Hundreds of aspiring pop stars emerged disappointed, even angry, from the stadium's metal gates.
    Miranda Tozier-Robbins of Fitchburg was one of the few contestants to leave waving the coveted blue paper -- instructions for today's callback at the Seaport Hotel in Boston. "I'm nervous, very nervous," the 22-year-old said.
    As the Emmy-nominated Fox talent show enters its fifth season, throngs of young people are scrambling to follow in the footsteps of previous winners, who have won recording contracts and instant -- if perhaps temporary -- fame.
    Ms. Tozier-Robbins wants another crack at judges Simon Cowell, Paula Abdul and Randy Jackson, but first she will have to pass the second audition. She sang for them last year in Orlando. This time around, she performed snippets of songs by Christina Aguilera and Britney Spears. She wore basic white clothes that highlighted her multi-ethnic look: she is black, Mexican and Comanche Indian.
    Everyone who was rejected yesterday had a theory about what the screeners were looking for. "I thought this was a talent contest!" shouted 22-year-old Laurie Chmielewski of Springfield, wearing a funky red cap on her stick-straight blond hair. She drew a crowd of media by bashing the show after her failed audition. "If they feel like it, they'll pass you," she said. "I really don't think it was about talent." She sang a few bars of Stevie Wonder's "Living for the City" for the news cameras and then shouted, "I think that was pretty good!"
    Damon Whitehurst, a clean-cut gospel singer and administrative assistant who traveled from Elizabeth, N.J., for the audition, said he was too good to get on "American Idol." "I think they're looking for the average," he said, "somebody they could work with, as opposed to somebody that knows what they're doing."
    Not everyone had sharp words for the show. Dighton college student Justine Guay, 19, said she was happy to have the experience. She sings karaoke when she is not commuting to the Gibbs College medical assistant program in Cranston, R.I. Auditioners said the screeners directed them to stand in groups of four. In one group, all four made the cut. Joanna Janetakis, 20, of St. James, Long Island, N.Y., was one of them. "I think it paid to be early," she said. "I think maybe after the judges hear a lot of people sing, their ears get tired."
    Others said being early hurt them. Ms. Janetakis camped out Monday night at the stadium to get an audition pass on Tuesday. Her mother couldn't stomach the rain, so she got a hotel room and bought her daughter a Winnie the Pooh tent. "Thank goodness," her daughter said, "because there was seriously like a monsoon."
    Other singers who made the first cut included Omar Ortiz of Fort Lauderdale, Fla., who was born in Boston and sang two country songs for the audition, and Rance Wright, a Boston Conservatory opera singer who said he was shocked at his success because "I ain't nobody's pop singer." Curt Doble of Danvers drew stares with his elaborate armor costume made of duct tape. He wore boots, a belt, gloves, shoulder armor, and a full mask and helmet, all with large spikes. He said he calls it his "Gwar" outfit because of the growling noise he makes. "I just wanted to be funny," he said. And perhaps get on TV.
    This story appeared on Page A1 of The Standard-Times on September 1, 2005.

    Wednesday, August 24, 2005

    I've signed and got my hair done

    I would have liked to have post this earlier but for now computer access is limited so for now it's old news to me but new news to you. I've signed my life away. I've done it before. Agreed to give up my rights for a cause I didn't really understand. Turned into a machine for fighting and killing. I wanted my American rights back. I broke the contract. A few nights ago I downloaded and printed the official release forms from the American Idol website. I read and understood I'm giving up my rights as a private citizen. This time there will be no turning back from the outcome that will happen. Fame or failure, humour or humiliation, I understand the document I signed. I'm 22. Old enough to sign on my own free will...

    So, when you start pulling and yanking the comb through your head that's probably a sign it needs a relaxer. Yes, I went to the salon and had a touchup. My hair was straightened straight but then I washed my hair yesterday and now it's a little puffy. I'll have to fix it again before I leave next week. Next week...I can't believe it's so soon. I'm so excited!

    Wednesday, August 10, 2005

    Are we there yet?

    I have a place to stay. Looking for directions to Gillete Stadium I find hotels, inns, motels, and a place to stay while I visit. No. I don't need any of that. I have a place to stay. Outside, on the ground, wrapped up in either the towel or sheet I'll bring. I don't think a blanket will fit in my bag. Okay, one might but I think I may be too lazy to carry one. Oh, carrying my bag full of food, cosmetics, and a sleeping component is just one aspect of my problems. Yes, the official American Idol website has confirmed Gillete Stadium is the location for auditions. Unfortunately, a commuter rail is not linked from Fitchburg to Foxboro. No, my rail starts, or ends, in Fitchburg, and goes through sister city Leominster, Shirley, Ayer, Littleton, South Acton, West Concord, Lincoln, Silver Hill, Hastings, Kendal Green, Brandeis, Waltham, Waverley, Belmont Center, Porter Square and finally arriving into Boston. North Station. No the trip doesn't end there. From North Station Boston, AKA the Fleetcenter home of the Celtics, I plan to ride my bike to South Station. It is from South Station I am going to jump on a commuter rail that leads me to Mansfield. Getting off there, my bike and I will trek between 4 and 10 miles to Foxboro searching for a stadium. Arriving in the wee hours of the morning, I will have a place to stay.

    Tuesday, August 09, 2005

    Idol Fever Approaching

    The dates are posted. Locations are not. Some have speculated their own location. On August 1st, or 2nd, I quickly checked my e-mail on my phone. I don't bother replying or do hardcore net searching, just something to give me a heads up on info I expect to see when I do get online. American Idol Season 5 auditions have been posted. Someone claimed the auditions for Boston will be held at Gillete Stadium, home of the Patriots. Okay, for all you tourists, Gillete Stadium is in Foxboro, NOT Boston. Also, I finally got a chance to check out the official American Idol website. There is no mention whatsoever of Gillete Stadium. As a matter of fact, the location is TBA. That's "To Be Announced" for those who don't know. My first song is prepared, wrapped, and ready to be delivered. My second song...TBA.

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